My Sabitical- written for those that feel

A deep longing emerged for me to escape to a place I could rest and delight in my surroundings. I prayed and left it to God to work the impossible if he wished. Thinking I would never see the desire become reality I went on in my routines.  However circumstances changed in shape and decisions were made. I was then ushered into 8 weeks of living in a different world. One in which I had two of my favorite parts of life, selah(Hebrew word for pausing and comtempating the goodness of God) and my family. I knew going into it I wanted to make some changes in my habits. I knew I wanted to be different. My desires were altering with my prespective following. Something was happening inside of me.  

However as I lived my sabitical I found it more complex and deeper than expected.  It began with reading, thinking, exploring, and sleeping. I felt uncomfortable at first not knowing what to make of it. Why was I really here?  What is this stirring in me? I was free to be different in this new environment. I could go without. I could add in.  I could rest a whole day or fill it with bliss.  I became patient.  

Then I started hearing. I heard the wisdom God wanted me to gain.  They came in bursts, exploding through my reality, tipping my world upside down. I sat there seeing truth, filled with awe. Indescribable.  I saw a new perspective, a new picture. I saw a true me. I saw what God wanted me to see.  The beauty that he created in me.  His shaping of me. With that view, it wasn't all that hard to make the changes. It was like they were made for me. They felt right. I was more me. These were all answers to many late night pleads to God during the past year. 

God in his infinite wisdom and love knew how long I needed to be on sabitical. He knew how much change I could manage. Therefore the time came for me to walk back into my old world. It would be as a new Shelly. A different woman. Honestly, I feared it at first. How will I ever be my new me in my old world? How will I be strong enough to resist the temptation of my old habits?  I turned my face to God and asked. He answered with an opening of my reality to his truth, "Shelly it is through your new prespective that you will make all those tiny and big decisions. I will be at your side." Honestly it has not been difficult but has been peaceful. With my new found resolve I walk through my old surroundings with a new light.

God changed me on my sabitical.

Note: I know you want to read what he showed me but it would be of no use to you, for you and I are uniquely different. For wisdom is not just words. It is words mixed with feelings and experience. Yet still you can find words on other posts that you may have feelings and experience that God will turn into wisdom for you. Most of all the Bible is where God will meet you. Seek him first.